Hide Your Eyes From Me.

"Let's work this out." I was about to say. But I didn't. I wonder why. Why not?

Hear this from me, I want to settle things out again. I want to organize myself again but I don't know how or even where to start. I had enough. I can't control myself whenever the situation attacks. I'm confuse again. I don't know where to turn my head on.

I had a job but I don't know if I did perform well. They told me to make 5 layouts that I thought will give me an instant 1500php in a week. But it turned out to be a failure. Wanna know why? Its because I supposed to take the photos myself. But really its not my fault. They didn't instruct me well before so I got the photos from net. So bye-bye 1500php in a week. Next they send me photos to restore. Its kinda hard coz the photos had so much damages but still I manage to edit the photo well and I thought it will cost 400php instantly. Oh~! After that, they send me an email saying they wanted me to do a on the spot job. So I said sure and ask when, but until now, there's still no reply.

Lets go to school. I can't believe it myself, I had higher grades now compare from the past semester. I've got 90+ in programming 04 and 06, in discreet. And guess what I've only got 80 in English which was my fave subject. In physics, well expect the low grades. The important thing there is that I passed the subject. I enjoy school days these past few weeks. Full of happy hours and the fact that I perform well at lessons. That is enough for me to feel comfy at school. I once got into Dean's List before and I wanted to again.

"Study and study and study." I was about to say. But I didn't.

There's something bothers me more now. Not the lessons, not the quizzes, nor the projects but nah~! I want it to stop running in my head. I've got plenty of stuffs to muse about, I want to stop thinking bout it.

There's more. I was elected as the design manager on our course organization that was organized last semester. As the design manger, I was told to design shirt, ID, and logo. And I did thinking about "I'm proud of myself when I see those shirts and IDs wore by the members with the logo". But something puffed in on my realization this morning. I have a friend that has skills on designing too. These past few days he always consulting me on his designs specifically on shirts that is for CITES (the org I was saying above). I asked him why and he told me that those designs are for the upcoming foundation day. I agreed that it was fine, but boom just suddenly! Does that mean that they're gonna use that design instead of mine without consulting me!? Oh~! I feel bad. I feel bypassed. but still I told myself "Don't jump into conclusion, clarify it first".

I'm going to sing for Paul insisted. I wanted to anyway. But I feel..embarrassed. Wanna know why? Its because I messed up on our practice yesterday. I thought I did the good job but wah~! No I didn't, did I?

I don't want to talk to people for now. I dont want to approach them.

Strawberry Jam.

Hep hep hep hep!

Today was not really a great day. But I can say that somehow it was--a little.
The reason why was because I had encountered skirmish along the roads from morning til tonight. I feel tired and defeated. Yes indeed. I had a fight with him again and I hate it. I feel very much down. Depressed, repressed, oppressed, suppressed--whatever! Well, just get the picture.

So here we are. I'm writing this journal to tell you the good thing that had happened this afternoon.
Note: "thing" as in without "s" meaning singular. Of all good things that can happen from morning til now, its just hard to believe that there's only one good thing that put some colors on my stupid day, what do you think? Well, I'm just being paranoid.

Anyway, so here you go. Again we had music jamming this afternoon and it was really fantastic. Once again I had a great time with them. Although I'm just an extra siting and circling and running around taking pictures and being juvenile there, somehow I felt belong. They practiced and played Smooth (Rob Thomas feat. Santana). I can't help but stamp my feet when the beat of the drums goes on. I can't help but stare and amaze by how Drew rock the drums wild. And Paul, whoa! He's really good. He really got his guitar squealed, if you know what I mean. I don't know the right term for that haha.




And Ace. he gave me some Goya chocolates. I shared it with Enrica.
Speaking of her. We had a secret haha..but I'm not going to share it to you. Not here! Its really a big secret, if you want to know what, ASK ME. (tee-hee)



Basically, the lights are bad inside the studio so I found it hard to take some good frames. This one was taken behind stage beside the drums. Fascinating, I love these guys--really. This was my first time to have guy friends that were not to shabby or arrogant or sarcastic although sometimes I hate them when they keep secrets and hide them behind the words "for boys only".
Though I know that's normal. Including with them, there still someone I'd like you to meet.


Tah-dah! Its the bubbly Rafael.



We're not close to each other actually, not until I lost my green handkerchief. Funny right? Getting close with simple stuffs. He's so bubbly and we like being with him (me, enrica and mich) cause his funny. No dull moments it seems. And for more useless void information, Rafael was not CS nor IT student. Aw..ful..haha..but still were cool. We were all cool with him.

No doubts Paul is really an experienced guitarist.I knew that. I've seen the proofs. I don't knew Drew and Ren that much when it comes to performance, but I can say that they're good. Paul twice told us about Ren's improving skills. Wow! And I noticed that improving performance of him just lately.



Well, at least this time I've got the pictures nicely. (clap clap)
Paul said he wanted me to sing with the band. I'm not really sure if that's gonna happen. Well, let's just see soon.

*With Enrica and Mich and Rafael and the Band : Paul, Drew, Ace, and Renuel.